The other day, Son No 2 asked me, "What is tee-u-tion?" Apparently, all his friends went for tee-u-tion and he was wondering why he did not.
Tee-u-tion is of course the local (mis)pronunciation of tuition.
I told him that he did not need tuition. Which is true and yet, not. This is because I personally coach him every weekday morning and so he does not need to go for tee-u-tion. At home, I take our coaching sessions seriously. We follow a fixed schedule: we start lessons at 9am every morning and end around 10-ish. When exams are near, we also do another short session at 9pm every night.
I have come to realise that, except for the really brilliant few, all students here do need tuition... for the simple reason that the young students are burdened with too many subjects. In the Chinese school that Son No 2 is attending, the students are expected to master 3 languages: Mandarin, Malay and English, besides other curriculum subjects, Math and Science. The standard of Mandarin and Malay are very high since both are pitched at the first language level. These two subjects alone take up most of our time. Language learning is really no joke. Luckily, Son No 2 reads a lot in English and has no problem there.
I have ranted endlessly about the system of education here. There are so many things that need fixing besides the curriculum. I have written to the press about it, many times, and even left my comments on the PM's webpage .... but this is not my focus today. Don't get me started! Coming back to Son No 2...
So, instead of engaging an external tutor, I am his personal tutor because I don't think anyone else can do a better job. Really. I am not trying to boast or anything... but the mother knows her child best AND the mother has the child's best interest at heart. Another advantage is that I can point out things to them that relate to their current learning, whether it is from the TV, newspapers or from the world around us.
Son No 2 is pretty disciplined himself and is a joy to teach most of the time, despite the inevitable ups and downs. He is now in the midst of his first term exams and he has been pretty pleased with himself the past few days.
When I pick him up after school, he would wear a big grin on his face. And in the car, he would be telling me what questions came out and how he answered them. Always seeking affirmation... and I would tell him that so long as he has done his best, that will be good enough. If he has made a mistake, it's ok, he just needs to learn from the mistake.
Son No 2 ever told me before that some of his friends were getting 3 marks, 14 marks, and so on, out of 100 marks. And I feel deeply for these children. Who will help these children? I know some of them are from disadvantaged background and I wish there's more institutional help for them....
But anyway, so Son No 2 is coping, despite the ills of the system. At the end of the day, the actual marks that he is getting is not that important. I just want him to maintain that positive self-esteem. That is reward enough for me.
Friday, 27 February 2009
Thursday, 26 February 2009
The Talk
I did not expect to get The Talk from Son No 3 yesterday.
Yesterday, Son No 3's school organized a Parents-Meet-The-Teachers session. Normally, there would be no school on that day but because his Chinese enrichment class was still on, he still needed to attend lessons. The prospect of my being around his school while he was having lessons must have troubled him. In the morning, Son No 3 made it point to specifically tell me that "when I am doing my work in my Chinese class, you don't look through the window and see (look at) me, ok?"
It was The Talk - the one where the children tell their parents how to - or not to - behave. Huh? I did not expect it so soon from Son No 3. He is two months shy of his 6-year-old birthday.
My hubby and I only received The Talk from Son No 1 when he was 10 years old. Son No 1 was going to perform a dance on stage and we would naturally be in the audience. Before the performance, he made sure he "prepped" us on how to behave. He told us that, whatever it is, Do Not Wave. Hmm... he must have been pretty bothered when we did that in the past. Clearly, our outward show of support was not appreciated.
I fully understand that there will come a time when children will want to be untied from the apron's strings. Heck, we raise them to be so - nurturing them to become confident and independent, ready to go out to embrace the world. So, should we be happily giving ourselves a pat on our backs?
Not so soon. I need to know one thing: that the children are NOT embarrassed to be seen with their parents. That they know that the image of them with loving, caring parents does not somewhat reduce their stature among their friends. That it does not take away their masculinity, manliness or machoism, whatever name we want to give to that quality that boys or men crave to be in front of their friends.
Of course I do not go out of my way to embarrass the children.
Recently, Son No 1 went for an outing at Mid-Valley with his classmates (5 girls and 4 boys). They were going to meet at KFC and then just hang out. When Son No 1 realised that I was going to park my car and go down with him, I could sense that he was kind of alarmed. But now that he was older and being the tactful boy that he was, he did not want to come outright to say that my presence would ...err, not be welcomed. Do not worry, I assured him, I was not going to tag along. [I didn't need to because two of the girls' mothers would be there *grin*] I was going window-shopping. See, I am not the molly-coddling parent.
I certainly do not want to hang out with their friends. But my point remains that my boys need to understand that it is alright to be seen with loving parents - whatever shape and sizes the parents are. If the friends view it negatively, then I would question the values held by those friends.
I remember this story one of my primary school teachers told us during moral lesson:
There was this girl who was ashamed of her mother because her mother was disfigured. In front of her friends, she would humiliate her and deny her presence. To the girl, the mother was ugly and she did not want to be associated with her at all.
Until one day, her principal called her in and told her why her mother was disfigured. When the girl was a baby, there was a big fire and the girl was trapped in the house. To save her baby, the mother fought her way through the flames, enveloping the little bundle with her own body. As a result, the mother was badly burnt and was disfigured.
Now, our lives are seldom fraught with such drama. But we do see the moral of the story.
So, you may ask, did I peep into Son No 3's Chinese class in the end? If you had ever been a mother of a pre-schooler, you would already know the answer. Truth be told.... of course I did.... I just made sure he did not see me!
Yesterday, Son No 3's school organized a Parents-Meet-The-Teachers session. Normally, there would be no school on that day but because his Chinese enrichment class was still on, he still needed to attend lessons. The prospect of my being around his school while he was having lessons must have troubled him. In the morning, Son No 3 made it point to specifically tell me that "when I am doing my work in my Chinese class, you don't look through the window and see (look at) me, ok?"
It was The Talk - the one where the children tell their parents how to - or not to - behave. Huh? I did not expect it so soon from Son No 3. He is two months shy of his 6-year-old birthday.
My hubby and I only received The Talk from Son No 1 when he was 10 years old. Son No 1 was going to perform a dance on stage and we would naturally be in the audience. Before the performance, he made sure he "prepped" us on how to behave. He told us that, whatever it is, Do Not Wave. Hmm... he must have been pretty bothered when we did that in the past. Clearly, our outward show of support was not appreciated.
I fully understand that there will come a time when children will want to be untied from the apron's strings. Heck, we raise them to be so - nurturing them to become confident and independent, ready to go out to embrace the world. So, should we be happily giving ourselves a pat on our backs?
Not so soon. I need to know one thing: that the children are NOT embarrassed to be seen with their parents. That they know that the image of them with loving, caring parents does not somewhat reduce their stature among their friends. That it does not take away their masculinity, manliness or machoism, whatever name we want to give to that quality that boys or men crave to be in front of their friends.
Of course I do not go out of my way to embarrass the children.
Recently, Son No 1 went for an outing at Mid-Valley with his classmates (5 girls and 4 boys). They were going to meet at KFC and then just hang out. When Son No 1 realised that I was going to park my car and go down with him, I could sense that he was kind of alarmed. But now that he was older and being the tactful boy that he was, he did not want to come outright to say that my presence would ...err, not be welcomed. Do not worry, I assured him, I was not going to tag along. [I didn't need to because two of the girls' mothers would be there *grin*] I was going window-shopping. See, I am not the molly-coddling parent.
I certainly do not want to hang out with their friends. But my point remains that my boys need to understand that it is alright to be seen with loving parents - whatever shape and sizes the parents are. If the friends view it negatively, then I would question the values held by those friends.
I remember this story one of my primary school teachers told us during moral lesson:
There was this girl who was ashamed of her mother because her mother was disfigured. In front of her friends, she would humiliate her and deny her presence. To the girl, the mother was ugly and she did not want to be associated with her at all.
Until one day, her principal called her in and told her why her mother was disfigured. When the girl was a baby, there was a big fire and the girl was trapped in the house. To save her baby, the mother fought her way through the flames, enveloping the little bundle with her own body. As a result, the mother was badly burnt and was disfigured.
Now, our lives are seldom fraught with such drama. But we do see the moral of the story.
So, you may ask, did I peep into Son No 3's Chinese class in the end? If you had ever been a mother of a pre-schooler, you would already know the answer. Truth be told.... of course I did.... I just made sure he did not see me!
Tuesday, 24 February 2009
The Myth of Multitasking
I am lousy at multi-tasking and I've always known it. I felt like an uber-underachiever when I was juggling work and family responsibilities. I was like going nowhere. This lack of ability to juggle tasks has seemed like a liability and a deficiency, especially when I look at some supermoms out there.
But now... aha, now I have come across a book that validates my position that multi-tasking is a myth (see left). We are essentially uni-task creatures.
According to this book, we cannot perform many jobs at one time and still achieve the same level of success, simply because our brain and neurological pathways are not designed that way. Millions of readers have since concurred that this has been their experience too. Good to know that I have lots of company out there.
Those who claim that they are great at multi-tasking may cry foul now. But really, according to the book, what they are doing is either 1) background-tasking or 2) switch-tasking. Yeah, learn these new jargons, man.
Background tasking has to do with focusing on one task while performing another task that does not require focus, like ironing clothes while watching TV. It is debatable though which is the background task and which is the task that requires focus. For me, ironing would require total focus and watching TV is the background task, though for others, it might be the other way round.
The other behaviour, switch-tasking, happens when one switches focus between tasks rapidly. The premise is that this is less efficient than completely focusing on one task and then moving on to the next task. According to the writer (and he has done studies to prove it), giving full attention to a task is more effective and efficient.
I do find it true in a way - I remember when I was studying for exams, I would listen to music, but the music would recede to the background when I was totally focused on my studies. However, when I was done studying one point, I would be able to hear the music again.
So to all the multi-taskers out there, it is time to examine if there is a better way to distribute tasks that need to be completed. People who, say, only answer emails during designated times like twice a day, understand this concept already. To be constantly distracted, in the name of being a super-multi-tasker, is actually counter-productive.
But now... aha, now I have come across a book that validates my position that multi-tasking is a myth (see left). We are essentially uni-task creatures.According to this book, we cannot perform many jobs at one time and still achieve the same level of success, simply because our brain and neurological pathways are not designed that way. Millions of readers have since concurred that this has been their experience too. Good to know that I have lots of company out there.
Those who claim that they are great at multi-tasking may cry foul now. But really, according to the book, what they are doing is either 1) background-tasking or 2) switch-tasking. Yeah, learn these new jargons, man.
Background tasking has to do with focusing on one task while performing another task that does not require focus, like ironing clothes while watching TV. It is debatable though which is the background task and which is the task that requires focus. For me, ironing would require total focus and watching TV is the background task, though for others, it might be the other way round.
The other behaviour, switch-tasking, happens when one switches focus between tasks rapidly. The premise is that this is less efficient than completely focusing on one task and then moving on to the next task. According to the writer (and he has done studies to prove it), giving full attention to a task is more effective and efficient.
I do find it true in a way - I remember when I was studying for exams, I would listen to music, but the music would recede to the background when I was totally focused on my studies. However, when I was done studying one point, I would be able to hear the music again.
So to all the multi-taskers out there, it is time to examine if there is a better way to distribute tasks that need to be completed. People who, say, only answer emails during designated times like twice a day, understand this concept already. To be constantly distracted, in the name of being a super-multi-tasker, is actually counter-productive.
Encounter With A True Penangite
The University, where I am working part-time, is based in Penang. In fact, my recruitment interview was conducted over Skype between KL and Penang. So I've never actually met any of my Penang colleagues face-to-face until a few months after I have joined the KL Office.
Penang is not really a small town (its industrial parks count Dell and Samsung among those which have chosen to set up assembly plants there) but it has managed to maintain that quaint small-town charm. Just last year, the Georgetown area was officially designated a World Heritage Site.
But it is its people that I am most amazed with. Penangites are some of the most personable people I have ever met. My best friend while I was in high school in Singapore hailed from Penang, as did many of my wonderful colleagues in Singapore. And after all these years, Penangites continue to win me over with their warmth and sincerity.
At my present workplace, I have many opportunities to come into contact with Penangites again. My first course coordinator is a graduate from USM, one of the top two local universities. She is now working for her PhD. Her surname is "Teoh", a dead giveaway that she is a Penangite (in other places, the surname is translated to "Teo" without the letter h at the end).
The first time she visited the KL Office, she greeted me like a long-lost friend and brought a box of tau-seah-peah for me and my family from Penang. Tau-seah-peah? It was totally unexpected and I was touched. Note that until that first meeting, we only shared a professional relationship over the e-mail. In the corporate world where I came from, I would never have thought of bringing gifts for my business acquaintances. If I did, it would be one of those really boring type of office momentoes. Not something as personal as tau-seah-peah, that delicious bean-paste pastry from Penang.
I would add that this course coordinator of mine is NOT your typical local graduate. She truly knows her job, is fluent in English and has one of the best working attitude I have ever seen on both sides of the Causeway. How I wish we can see more of her kind in the working world.
At the end of that first visit, it suffices to say that I know more about her hubby and one-year-old daughter, than she knows about my family. Before she left, she issued me an open invitation, saying that any time, I am in Penang, drop by at her office and she promises to show me around. The way she said it, it did not sound like lip service at all.
I don't deserve this. I am born and bred in the city (as if that gives me an excuse) and in my working relationships, I have always been direct and professional. I have had no reason to examine any other mode of interaction. Where I came from, we always strived to behave professionally (read: in a task-oriented, objective-focussed manner, without being personal). That's how one gains respect in the workplace.
Later, when my course coordinator moved on to another assignment, she sent me a thank-you card, not the electronic type, but a paper-based, signed-with-ink, and inserted-into-an-envelope type. Now, why shouldn't I be surprised? That gesture is totally in keeping with her character.
It's not that she's not internet-savvy - after all, the university runs on-line university courses - but she took the trouble to be personable. We all could learn a lesson or two from her.
Penang is not really a small town (its industrial parks count Dell and Samsung among those which have chosen to set up assembly plants there) but it has managed to maintain that quaint small-town charm. Just last year, the Georgetown area was officially designated a World Heritage Site.
But it is its people that I am most amazed with. Penangites are some of the most personable people I have ever met. My best friend while I was in high school in Singapore hailed from Penang, as did many of my wonderful colleagues in Singapore. And after all these years, Penangites continue to win me over with their warmth and sincerity.
At my present workplace, I have many opportunities to come into contact with Penangites again. My first course coordinator is a graduate from USM, one of the top two local universities. She is now working for her PhD. Her surname is "Teoh", a dead giveaway that she is a Penangite (in other places, the surname is translated to "Teo" without the letter h at the end).
The first time she visited the KL Office, she greeted me like a long-lost friend and brought a box of tau-seah-peah for me and my family from Penang. Tau-seah-peah? It was totally unexpected and I was touched. Note that until that first meeting, we only shared a professional relationship over the e-mail. In the corporate world where I came from, I would never have thought of bringing gifts for my business acquaintances. If I did, it would be one of those really boring type of office momentoes. Not something as personal as tau-seah-peah, that delicious bean-paste pastry from Penang.
I would add that this course coordinator of mine is NOT your typical local graduate. She truly knows her job, is fluent in English and has one of the best working attitude I have ever seen on both sides of the Causeway. How I wish we can see more of her kind in the working world.
At the end of that first visit, it suffices to say that I know more about her hubby and one-year-old daughter, than she knows about my family. Before she left, she issued me an open invitation, saying that any time, I am in Penang, drop by at her office and she promises to show me around. The way she said it, it did not sound like lip service at all.
I don't deserve this. I am born and bred in the city (as if that gives me an excuse) and in my working relationships, I have always been direct and professional. I have had no reason to examine any other mode of interaction. Where I came from, we always strived to behave professionally (read: in a task-oriented, objective-focussed manner, without being personal). That's how one gains respect in the workplace.
Later, when my course coordinator moved on to another assignment, she sent me a thank-you card, not the electronic type, but a paper-based, signed-with-ink, and inserted-into-an-envelope type. Now, why shouldn't I be surprised? That gesture is totally in keeping with her character.
It's not that she's not internet-savvy - after all, the university runs on-line university courses - but she took the trouble to be personable. We all could learn a lesson or two from her.
Saturday, 21 February 2009
Why Grades Matter
Some people believe that all I care about my sons is their academic achievement. Some people do not know me at all.
I practise what I preach - when I say that there are 5 aspects of development that is important in a child: Cognitive, Emotional, Physical, Social and Moral. And I do all I can to make sure that they develop into well-rounded and well-adjusted adults. Of course, sometimes my best is not enough - I recognise my own limitations - though any failing is not through lack of effort on my part.
Of course there are very talented people in non-academic areas who have gone on to achieve phenomenal success, and I am not belittling their achievements in any way. Some may be extraordinarily gifted in EQ and some may have some cultural or material advantage. Some are at the right place at the right time. Good for all of them.
But statistically, we have seen that people who have done well in school have a higher chance of leading a successful life. People used to say that education is the key to escaping the poverty trap and it still holds true today. A good education is still the best insurance that a parent can subscribe to for the child.
Whatever liberals may think, academic achievement is important for a child to build self-esteem which is undoubtedly a pre-requisite to success. Especially in our society. In some schools, teachers actually punish students for scoring low marks. Think what that will do to a child's self- esteem. And in family gatherings, people do ask, how is the child doing in school? These are things that we cannot change. That's why I spend considerable amount of time and effort to help my children in their school work. I do not believe that I pressurize them too much; I just want to make sure, as a responsible parent, that they have done their best.
We also have to look at our children from a strategic point of view. In business, we do the SWOT analysis, that is, we look at the organization's Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats, to come up with a competitive strategy. The same can be applied to our children.
If we understand their strengths and weaknesses, we will have an idea how to guide them through life. They need to leverage on their strengths in light of the opportunities that are availed to them. And that's why there is really no broad-brush approach to guiding a child. For example, if a child is going to take over the father's business, then arguably academic qualifications may be less important.
What if the child cannot get good grades in school, even if he has tried his best? Yes, that's the difficult part and there are parents who face this very real dilemma. It may not be that their children are lacking in cognitive ability. It could be just that the system is working against their children. I have seen this in both Singapore and Malaysia. And I can understand why parents are very concerned and would even go to the extent of migration for their children's future. [Foreign education systems have their flaws too but that's besides the point for now.]
The point is, before we need to take any drastic steps, first, we need to help the children cope in school and if possible, excel. Then, if they can't cope, we see if we can continue to nurture their spirit in other ways. If that also fails, only then may parents want to consider other options.
These are all realities of living in this part of the world. Our education systems, on both sides of the Causeway, are not the best, nor are they the worst.
Bottom-line is this: children want to do well in school. It makes them feel good. It is when they keep failing, that their self-esteem goes south and then it becomes a downward spiral. This is the path that we do not want our children to take.
I practise what I preach - when I say that there are 5 aspects of development that is important in a child: Cognitive, Emotional, Physical, Social and Moral. And I do all I can to make sure that they develop into well-rounded and well-adjusted adults. Of course, sometimes my best is not enough - I recognise my own limitations - though any failing is not through lack of effort on my part.
Enough said. At the end of the day, how much we want to make out of parenting is an individual choice. It can be the simplest thing in the world (clothe and feed them) or it can be an all-consuming effort.
But I would like to share my thoughts on why grades are important. Let's be clear, I am not saying that it is all-important - but it is important, nevertheless. It may sound like a motherhood statement, especially within the context of our Asian culture, to even think otherwise, but increasingly there are so-called "liberals" in the world who think that doing well in school is not a big deal. And they go on to quote successful people who have not done well in school and yet have done very well in life.Of course there are very talented people in non-academic areas who have gone on to achieve phenomenal success, and I am not belittling their achievements in any way. Some may be extraordinarily gifted in EQ and some may have some cultural or material advantage. Some are at the right place at the right time. Good for all of them.
But statistically, we have seen that people who have done well in school have a higher chance of leading a successful life. People used to say that education is the key to escaping the poverty trap and it still holds true today. A good education is still the best insurance that a parent can subscribe to for the child.
Whatever liberals may think, academic achievement is important for a child to build self-esteem which is undoubtedly a pre-requisite to success. Especially in our society. In some schools, teachers actually punish students for scoring low marks. Think what that will do to a child's self- esteem. And in family gatherings, people do ask, how is the child doing in school? These are things that we cannot change. That's why I spend considerable amount of time and effort to help my children in their school work. I do not believe that I pressurize them too much; I just want to make sure, as a responsible parent, that they have done their best.
We also have to look at our children from a strategic point of view. In business, we do the SWOT analysis, that is, we look at the organization's Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats, to come up with a competitive strategy. The same can be applied to our children.
If we understand their strengths and weaknesses, we will have an idea how to guide them through life. They need to leverage on their strengths in light of the opportunities that are availed to them. And that's why there is really no broad-brush approach to guiding a child. For example, if a child is going to take over the father's business, then arguably academic qualifications may be less important.
What if the child cannot get good grades in school, even if he has tried his best? Yes, that's the difficult part and there are parents who face this very real dilemma. It may not be that their children are lacking in cognitive ability. It could be just that the system is working against their children. I have seen this in both Singapore and Malaysia. And I can understand why parents are very concerned and would even go to the extent of migration for their children's future. [Foreign education systems have their flaws too but that's besides the point for now.]
The point is, before we need to take any drastic steps, first, we need to help the children cope in school and if possible, excel. Then, if they can't cope, we see if we can continue to nurture their spirit in other ways. If that also fails, only then may parents want to consider other options.
These are all realities of living in this part of the world. Our education systems, on both sides of the Causeway, are not the best, nor are they the worst.
Bottom-line is this: children want to do well in school. It makes them feel good. It is when they keep failing, that their self-esteem goes south and then it becomes a downward spiral. This is the path that we do not want our children to take.
Friday, 20 February 2009
25 Random Things About Me
I've been tagged! Thanks, sweet niece.
I've been dying to get tagged since reading many blogs written by those who were tagged. So now I am supposed to write 25 random things about myself? Well, here goes...
1 I love my family insanely. Though sometimes I do wish I can love them less and love myself more...
2 I'd always wish I have soft hair. My hair is thick and stiff, and even bonding doesn't help to soften its texture, so styling is very limited. Ah, for some blow-in-your-face type of wispy hair...
3 My 3 favourite ice-cream flavours are rum and raisin, mint chocolate chip and macadamia nut from Haagen Daz.
4 If I could do only one piece of plastic surgery, I would do a liposuction on my tummy.
5 My dream travel destination - the Silk Road/Tibet.
6 I am a thinker. And proud to be one.
7 I am passionate about issues of the day. It's like I've missed out on the revolutionary youth phase or something and am now making up for it.
8 I like to read... a lot... novels, biographies, newspapers, blogs, and even textbooks. Seriously.
9 I also like to write a lot. My writing skills served me well when I was holding a paid job, and now I am writing for myself....which is nice. And sometimes, I write to the press or on on-line forums to let off steam.
9 My favourite character from Grey's Anatomy is Dr Izzie Stevens. I imagine if I were a doctor, I would be like her.
10 My good friends from varsity are surprisingly like me, a stay-at-home mom to a brood of kids. One has 5 children, another has 4 children. Hmm... in a world where two-kid families and working moms are the norm, we must have shared many common values, even in our younger days. No wonder we clicked.
11 I am a good driver. I practise driving on the road like 4-5 hours a day.
12 I can't imagine a life without responsibilities. Kind of sad, isn't it?
13 I love playing the piano. Always have and always will. What I play depends on my mood. Remember Clair de Lune from Twilight? The piece that Edward put on in his bedroom? I can play that too :)
14 I hate Malaysian politics. Really, really hate it.
15 Sometimes, I wish I have a daughter. I love my sons, but to have a girl to balance the yang... that would have been so-awesome. Well, sometimes the boys wish they have a sister too.... so I shouldn't feel bad about it. Just natural instinct.
16 When I watch shows that portray the close mother-daughter bond, like in Joy Luck Club, my eyes would be filled with tears. I am thinking of my own complex relationship with my mother. No wonder Amy Tan is one of my favourite authors.
17 Mosquitoes love me.
18 I am not a people-person. Most people think I am aloof, since young. Others are wary about the intensity of my emotions, especially on things that I feel strongly about. I don't do small talk.
19 I am still using the handphone that I bought in 2003. The last watch that I owned lasted me more than 15 years. I generally do not discard things until they are non-functional.
20 I still have the blouse that I wore for my Varsity interview, and that's like donkey years ago.
21 I do not understand why God made us such that we need to exercise in order to be healthy. The only exercise I do daily is walking up and down the stairs leading to my carpark and stretching my right arm when I need to pay toll using my Touch-And-Go card.
22 I have zilch cooking skills. The other day, my second son paid me a compliment when he said that even when mummy cooked the steamed pork, it still tasted good.
23 Hoop earrings in white gold are my signature accessories. I have like 5 pairs of them now, in different sizes and thickness.
24 I love Andrew Lloyd Webber's musicals, though my all-time favourite is Les Miserables.
25 I just want everyone to be happy. Why is it so difficult?
The Pet Society Champ
Son No 3 is the biggest fan of Pet Society, the computer game on Facebook.
Those who are Friends with Son No 3, and have been playing the game, will realise that over the past two weeks, Son No 3 has soared in his rankings. It may appear that he has been spending an excessive amount of time playing the game... but I can vouch that he has not played more than usual, which is about an hour daily. He has also maintained the same number of Friends because I do not allow him to anyhow add on Friends.
What happened was that he has found the .... secret, if you like.... to the game and has managed to level up very, very quickly. I know the "secret" but am not about to disclose it here :)
I do keep a close watch on how my boys play the game (or any game, in fact) and I must say I am quite impressed with how Son No 3 plays Pet Society. He analyses the game, sets a goal, is single-minded about achieving this goal and understands the concept of trade-off..... (wow). Ya, wow. But really... let me explain.
Two weeks ago, Son No 3's pet, Name, was ranked third in the game among his Friends. He decided to set an immediate goal to beat Copper, then at second place. And to do that he knew that he had to accumulate paw points so that he could level up.
So, Son No 3 tried this and that and finally, voila, he stumbled upon a strategy! He was visibly excited and I must admit that I was excited for him too. It was a simple strategy. But now I understand why he sold off everything that he owned - it was not due to any whim - but really, to get coins which he could convert via some indirect means to points. That's why his pet's house was bare and the pet was not clothed. To him, it was no sacrifice - he just did what he needed to do.
Meanwhile, the rest of the family shared in his excitement as he would update us daily how close he was to achieving his goal.
After he has beaten Copper, I thought that was it. But no, Son No 3 has set his sights higher. His next goal was to beat Snuffles. Snuffles was way above him in terms of points at that time but bit by bit, he chipped off the difference until one day, he emerged top in the rankings. He was on top of the world!
Even then, he continued to play until he estimated that he was 3 days ahead of Snuffles. Only then did he relax. Now, he plays more leisurely and has finally spent some of his coins buying clothes and furniture.
I have learnt a lot about my son from this episode. But I am not going to go all-heavy and do an on-line analysis of him here (I shall do it in the private recesses of my mind :)) When I see my children, each with very distinct set of characteristics, I am more convinced than ever that, as the Chinese saying goes, it is easier to shift a mountain than to change a person's basic character. Some traits are truly inborn.
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